Sisters, Lizards, Pretties, and Top/Bottom Dean/Sam

[citrus_java]

Sisters:
Heh, sister and I got asked today how long we'd been together (they had to ask me three times till I understood what they were saying, LOL). Which reminded me - I'd forgotten we used to get that question a lot a couple of years back. puts all those Winchester scenes in a different perspective. Though I insist that choosing to include them, and so many of them, in a text, means a whole lot :)

Lizards:
Every night, for the past couple of nights, and I suspect before that too, two small lizards meet at a certain spot near the ceiling and chat, making small noises that first drew my attention to them. That is so cute.

Pretties!
Oh, look at all the pretties stir_of_echoes made!



It's interesting to me that Dean was the one directed to be more dominant, and Sam the one submitting, here, unlike in later seasons. In almost all of Dean's love/sex scenes in later seasons - and from what I've seen, almost all of Jensen's - stands there and experiences, gets kissed, gets touched, and reacts so beautifully I just- OK, back on track, me.I notice that in a lot of older fics Dean is considered "the obvious top". Did that change after that Sam/Ruby scene? Or unrelated?

I'm generally not a fan of the top/bottom discussion, I don't like that it links so many characteristics and relationship elements to a preference of position. Especially not when it's also linked to "being the girl", which bothers me from every one of my genders, and as a trans person too. ot to mention, having to define yourself according to your partner/force your partner to define themselves a way they don't like to keep your identity.

That said, when I disconnect it from the stereotypes and think about it as play, I like the role playing around it, like the negotiations it sometimes comes with, like the identity issues it brings up (and even more when they're Sam's, cause that's rarer), and most of all love having a variety of depictions. Since it's linked to so many things, it's lovely to be able to see the different sides of the boys in different stories, or even better - in the same stories. And it's awesome there there is so much fic in which there is definitely no clear top/bottom. I just love that there are many options, that are all considered in character.

Comments

[tabaqui]

How cool, the lizards! What kind are they?

I always thought it was very cool that either deliberately or through personal preference, Dean's sex scenes are really a lot more like 'love' scenes - if he has the remotest of feelings for his partner, it's all very slow and touchy and almost worshipful with ,yes, Dean on the 'bottom' quite a bit. It's cool to see a guy on tv having no issues with letting the woman be in control.

And Sam's sex scenes - he is *so* aggressive. Whether it's all the bitey stuff with Madison or the physically picking a woman up and manipulating her body when he was soulless, he's *very* 'on top'. And yet, of course, out of bed, the roles are often reversed and Sam is the one shown to more often be sensitive and gentle to witnesses and such. Makes for some awesome dynamics and speculation.

I, too, dislike all the baggage that comes from the top/bottom junk, and usually my characters just switch off whenever the mood strikes them. Sometimes one *does* prefer it a certain way, and that's fine, but it's about them as a whole person and never 'This is Joe Smith, a Top!'.

[balder12.livejournal.com]

I think the fandom switch from top!Dean to bottom!Dean happened around S3 and S4, where Dean was very psychologically vulnerable, and Sam was increasingly BAMF in trying to first save and then avenge him. Plus, Jared grew into his height around S3--he stopped being "gawky kid" and started being "Greek god." And a lot of people associate topping with size and muscularity.

I don't care who physically tops/bottoms in fic, but it bothers me when it's treated as a characterization rather than a matter of sexual taste. The thinking seems to be: being penetrated = being a girl = being weak, which is messed up at every step. Plus, fandom blurs the lines between bottoming and subbing in a way I find problematic. The vast majority of people who enjoy being penetrated aren't sexually submissive, and not all sexual submissives enjoy penetration, but in fandom "bottom" is often assumed to encompass both. I love fics where sexual roles are negotiated, like you said, and I wish that happened more often. I'm a sucker for fic where people talk about sex in a believable, non "Very Special Episode" kind of way. And it's cool that all the big pairings in SPN fandom have at least some variety in who tops.

On a selfish level, I wish there was more non-penetrative sex where top/bottom isn't an issue. I mean, I enjoy lots of fics with anal, and have written several, but I wish there were more where handjobs/oral/intercrural/whatever was the main course instead of just foreplay.