![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
citrus_javaYesterday I was talking with this person in power - long story, I was suggesting opening a space for women and NB people only and offering my help in that. And she got really mad at the concept because of course, and just started blaming me for the world, ignoring what I was saying, telling me what I was saying and them blaming me for THAT.
Now, I will take a stand for yelling at people in power when they opress you. I am FOR IT!
But I also know that it's the easiest way out for people in power - and they will be douchbags and use it almost always. No matter what they did - "she yelled at me" - even if you don't yell, I've found - "I don't like your tone"
- and they consider themselves right about the entire thing as a result, and their friends will also say so, because douchbags move in packs.
My point is -
I keep remembering myself saying, pleasantly - "hey, that's not a fair way to communicate" and "I didn't say that, not cool ", like Richie Cunningham as a summer camp instructor....
which makes me laugh and smile at myself
because it is very hard to use that sort fo thing against you
(though some people will )
She ended up taking back one of the things she said -
but there will be no (exclusionary, ungratefulish) spaces for women (because women not coming at all because they are feeling unsafe around harass-y men, and NB people not participated because they are being mocked - that is not exclusionary) - not that she is against it.
Now, I will take a stand for yelling at people in power when they opress you. I am FOR IT!
But I also know that it's the easiest way out for people in power - and they will be douchbags and use it almost always. No matter what they did - "she yelled at me" - even if you don't yell, I've found - "I don't like your tone"
- and they consider themselves right about the entire thing as a result, and their friends will also say so, because douchbags move in packs.
My point is -
I keep remembering myself saying, pleasantly - "hey, that's not a fair way to communicate" and "I didn't say that, not cool ", like Richie Cunningham as a summer camp instructor....
which makes me laugh and smile at myself
because it is very hard to use that sort fo thing against you
(though some people will )
She ended up taking back one of the things she said -
but there will be no (exclusionary, ungratefulish) spaces for women (because women not coming at all because they are feeling unsafe around harass-y men, and NB people not participated because they are being mocked - that is not exclusionary) - not that she is against it.
