Swan Song - Yeah... I agree that in didn't have an amazing buildup like season 3, but. But. But . And then AHBL also has that *amazing * scene and Dean's decision - I never watched it unspoiled, but that sounds huge - and the boy's conversation in the end, and John's moment ...
Bobby - I very much agree with that characterization, and yeah, the first time around (and all times around till now, though there haven’t been that many) I'd probably consider it more of a disability cliché – of course if you're disabled you feel worthless, of course of you're gay in an '80's movie you want to die/achieve that goal.
But OTOH - regardless of how things *should* be portrayed, and in a big way because of the way they are - I know from myself that it can be very humbling not to be able to do things that "anybody could do". I know, for me, the day I got that I can't even make tea - was a bad one. Always having to calculate how much to try to hide it, how much to admit (and lose 'human' status) - how much to ask for help, how much to be willing to accept help…
And for Bobby – I'm sure he hides most of what he can't do (even – doesn't his house have several floors? And do you see Bobby installing those lift thingies and using them comfortably in front of people?) He can't do his job, the actual money paying job. All his hunter friends and ll his work acquaintances , all the people who consider him this manly man, all the people who consider him a person, are just not around. And he has to go through this loss, the adjustment and so on alone.
I bet he really needs help, and hates himself for that, cause he'd like to be contributing to the fight, rather than wishing he would allow himself to pull anyone away from it and get help - even just someone to talk with. And he's probably hurting over being abandoned like that – and also hating himself for feeling that when other people were dealing with 'real' problems, 'end of the world' problems.
Bobby is always helping other people. That is part of his identity IMO. So no only not being able to do those things, but also wanting/needing help - would probably, or possibly, make him feel pretty useless. And with the daily, much more than daily - getting phone calls from people who want stuff for cars, from hunter asking if he could do whatever small help they need cause they're 10 hours away – even things like making them an anti-possession amulet, which he might not be able to do anymore. Bobby is a pretty hands on, private, doing things himself kind of guy. He'd probably not want to let civilians in (especially since they could always be monsters).
And he probably feels incredibly exposed, even if he's able to get to his panic room. For all he'd say he didn't care, demons and angels can easily break his wards and come in, and he might not be able to repaint things like the ceiling (or ask any neighbors or volunteers or paid help to do it for him, even), and even less able than usual to protect himself. In a situation like that, I might tell myself that it's not like I can protect myself normally, or tell myself to get over it – everybody's in a fight, the world is ending, and if you die – you die. You know, quit being a baby about that. None of those things contributes to feeling worthwhile.
no subject
Yeah...
I agree that in didn't have an amazing buildup like season 3, but. But. But .
And then AHBL also has that *amazing * scene and Dean's decision - I never watched it unspoiled, but that sounds huge - and the boy's conversation in the end, and John's moment ...
Bobby -
I very much agree with that characterization, and yeah, the first time around (and all times around till now, though there haven’t been that many) I'd probably consider it more of a disability cliché – of course if you're disabled you feel worthless, of course of you're gay in an '80's movie you want to die/achieve that goal.
But OTOH - regardless of how things *should* be portrayed, and in a big way because of the way they are - I know from myself that it can be very humbling not to be able to do things that "anybody could do". I know, for me, the day I got that I can't even make tea - was a bad one. Always having to calculate how much to try to hide it, how much to admit (and lose 'human' status) - how much to ask for help, how much to be willing to accept help…
And for Bobby – I'm sure he hides most of what he can't do (even – doesn't his house have several floors? And do you see Bobby installing those lift thingies and using them comfortably in front of people?)
He can't do his job, the actual money paying job. All his hunter friends and ll his work acquaintances , all the people who consider him this manly man, all the people who consider him a person, are just not around. And he has to go through this loss, the adjustment and so on alone.
I bet he really needs help, and hates himself for that, cause he'd like to be contributing to the fight, rather than wishing he would allow himself to pull anyone away from it and get help - even just someone to talk with. And he's probably hurting over being abandoned like that – and also hating himself for feeling that when other people were dealing with 'real' problems, 'end of the world' problems.
Bobby is always helping other people. That is part of his identity IMO. So no only not being able to do those things, but also wanting/needing help - would probably, or possibly, make him feel pretty useless. And with the daily, much more than daily - getting phone calls from people who want stuff for cars, from hunter asking if he could do whatever small help they need cause they're 10 hours away – even things like making them an anti-possession amulet, which he might not be able to do anymore. Bobby is a pretty hands on, private, doing things himself kind of guy. He'd probably not want to let civilians in (especially since they could always be monsters).
And he probably feels incredibly exposed, even if he's able to get to his panic room. For all he'd say he didn't care, demons and angels can easily break his wards and come in, and he might not be able to repaint things like the ceiling (or ask any neighbors or volunteers or paid help to do it for him, even), and even less able than usual to protect himself. In a situation like that, I might tell myself that it's not like I can protect myself normally, or tell myself to get over it – everybody's in a fight, the world is ending, and if you die – you die. You know, quit being a baby about that. None of those things contributes to feeling worthwhile.