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[ profile] kalliel[Bad username or site: @]! Remember the whole discussion about Jared somehow always being to Jensen's right? Or was that Dean/Sam?
There's new evidence!
m 01:00

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Title: Took my chances on a big jet place
Pairing: >Dean & Sam
Words: 850
Warnings: recreational drug and alcohol use, brief mention of sex work
Spoilers: small spoiler for 11x19

It was probably oregano anyway

Dean feels around the cooler for his last beer. It's warm and damp, but it's not like he's wearing a top hat either. Tried to get all the dust and mud off his clothes before touching Baby, but even stripped half naked he's dragging some forest onto her leather. He pats the seat, swipes the filth away with a gentle thumb. Gonna give her a nice tuneup when they're outta there, he promises her, himself.

Five days he hasn't seen a living soul, or a dead one for that matter, trail's cold, and he's getting twitchy in all that nothin. Dad's in Colorado, looking into reports of localizes hurricanes, coming out of nowhere, going nowhere, plenty of eyewitnesses but no blip on the meteorological radar. Dean hasn't heard from him since he left. Tells himself it's the reception in the forest, but he knows it's crystal.

He thumbs the phone, good five bars of reception.

Drinks his beer.

He could step right out of the world, no blip. He might not even notice if he did.

Calls information, asks for the number of one Robert Singer. Listens to his voice, unsure for a moment, that he still knows how to talk with anyone. There is a lot of empty in the forest.

Information hangs up. Shoulda kept the number of the girl with the cowboy boots from the bar last year. Or the chat line card someone stuck on his windshield wiper.

He's asleep by the time his phone rings. The tinny cellphone notes of Brown Eyed Girl. Hasn't played it in almost two years, and Dean's heart is beating hard before he's awake, before he registers the sound.

"Sammy? You ok?"

"Dean?" The voice sounds small and distant.

There's some rustling, then Sam swallows.

"What's going on?"

"Dean, did you ever- The parties you went to, did you never- The girls you-"

Dean's mind is racing. Halloween haunted house come to life? College succubus? Pregnant college succubus?"

"Sam, spit it out!"

Sam's voice goes meeker. "Did you ever try-"

Orgies? A girl's underwear on?

"Did you ever try smoking?"

Dean sputters. "Sammy!"

"Like - weed?"

"You smoke now?" California takes Dean's geek baby brother, it should have the decency to give him back the way it got him.

"Dean" Sam's voice is part way between annoyed and pleading. "I don't know if - if it feels right".

"What's it feel like?"

"I just - I - I - wanna puke and throw up, and" Sam's breathing gets sharp, and Dean can't hear if it's fear or tears. Dean knows shit about getting high, but he knows his brother, and he knows his Mick Jagger Mars Bar lore.

"Listen, Sammy, you got anything with sugar on you?"

"No, but it's fine, Dean, I'm fine".

"the hell you are. Listen, Sammy" Dean does Dad voice, like there's no doubt in the world. "You're stoned, you're paranoid, that's all. You don't gotta fight it, you're golden. All you gotta do is ride this out. Will be over in an hour".

Sam swallows. "What if it was - you know, what if there was something in it?"

Dean's thinking about the same lines, but that's not comin out of his mouth. "Dude, you're not in Em City, you're in college, it was probably overpriced oregano. You jonesing for pizza?"

Sam snorts, but he's still breathing wrong. "Dean, there was - in the paper - about someone like you, missing and I know it wasn't you because - but his picture looked a little - and I started thinking what if you or Dad - and I - you are missing and I - this guy Don had a joint and I - I just didn't want to think about it"

"Woah, woah, Sammy" Dean says, quiet. "Didn't go missing". I didn't go missing. "'m right here, you hear me?"

"Yeah, yeah. I know" Sam tries to sound grown up, and only misses by a few years. Like Dean's voice sounded in his ears when that spirit had Dean by the throat, and Dad was bleeding out - grown up and messed up and scared. "Just you're not here, and I just, I didn't want - if something wasn't gonna be ok with you - or - me - I didn't want to never - just wanted to I wanted to-"

"'s alright"

Sam's breathing a bit better now, and Dean's chest unclenches. "So what, you're embracing the ways of the locals? Flowers in your hair?"

Dean can hear the weak smile in Sam's voice. "You'd love it. They put broccoli on their pizza".

Dean makes the expected a disgusted voice, like it's a normal conversation, like they still know how to talk with each other proper.

"It's better than fried spam for breakfast".

"It's good enough for Commander Sheers, it's good enough for me".

"Commander Sheers never ate fried spam".

"You're high".

Sam laughs.

Dean tries for more.

"Little Sammy, a space cowboy, riding shotgun on the Great Red Shark!"

"You're such an ass" Sam's voice is warm, and he sounds ok, sounds regular.

"Rock on gold dust woman! Don’t Step on the Grass, Sam"

"Dean" Sam asks, like there's too much space in his world too, too many miles of room.

"Yeah, Sammy?"

"Stay on the phone with me till the hour's over?"

"Sure, kid".
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Just these two - Winchsters, and J2:

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Title: Who Knows What We Might Become
Relationship: Dean/Sam
Rating: NC-17
Words: 795
Warnings: very mild mentions of gore, the sex is never official
Notes: Thank you KnottedString for the beta, and for being such a wonderful person too.
Inspired by this lovely prompt - thank you, prompter!
(as always, I'd be glad to dedicate the fic to you if you wanted)
And thank you mods!
Notes 2: I intentionally left the time this takes place unclear, but I enjoy imagining it is current day Sam and Dean <3

It's not weird, it's just this thing they do

Sam moves his hand up Dean’s cock, and Dean holds back a groan. He is almost dripping excitement, eagerness, terror. His body is confused. That is why it works. It is just stimulations. Dean is a healthy young man and Sammy’s stupid hair is soft like a girl’s.

Dean stopped believing those some time back, but he still repeats them every time. Still goes back and forth cause it can’t be, cause he can’t like – it. Can’t like it like that.

“Eyeballs scum,” Sam says, and Dean lets out a breath as he reigns his cock back to mostly soft .

Dean doesn’t really care about the eyeballs.

But whoever’s hard is an eye scum perv.

Victorious, Dean holds tighter onto Sam’s wet cock. “Maggot burger,” he offers offhand. Sam’s lips are parted, eyes stuck to Dean’s neck. He's not listening. Dean allows himself just another pull, two, the way he knows Sam likes it. Shit. Doing this thing means Dean knows how Sammy likes his dick touched. The realization sends a sick shiver whirling through Dean’s stomach, making his cheeks flush high and thrilling down between his legs.

Sam swallows, eyes closed, hand still wrapped around Dean’s twitching cock. Sam’s voice is a little weird when he says - “you sick fuck.” Dean’s mouth goes dry, hand frozen on Sam’s cock. The tension sends tingles to Dean’s dick, and he can’t even tell if they’re making him harder or softer

“Dean humps maggot burgers in bed.”

The thrill of relief is almost as good as Sam’s hand, that moment. “Yeah, Sammy.” Dean concedes easily. Would have agreed to anything Sam said about him right that moment. “I do." He smiles, wide and loose, almost can’t control it.
Sam smiles back, looking dazed. Dean wants every bit of that dopy grin, wants to rub himself against it, burrow in. live in it. He moves his hand lower, presses that sweet spot behind Sam’s balls. Breathes “Ghost mucus,” in Sam’s ear. Sam’s breath hitches, and Dean’s entire body tunes to it, nerves alight. He clamps down on the feeling, Sam’s cock completely hard in Dean’s hand. It’s socking, makes him want to pull his hand away on instinct, avoid a burn, but he doesn’t seem to have that sort of drive for self-preservation. His brother’s dick in Dean’s hand, it’s disgusting. It is, it must be. Dean clamps down on these thoughts, along with Sam’s cock. It’s against the rules to help each other out, get each other soft, but Dean is older and his rules are higher. Can’t lose Sammy. Can’t let them crash.

Sam’s eyes widen at the pressure on his cock, almost pained. His hard on fades, thank fuck, but his eyes blaze dark, like he finds satisfaction in it. Like he finds satisfaction in denying himself pleasure. Man, they are fucked up, Dean thinks, almost impressed, but without real drive. His mind is already wandering to more interesting things. It is Sam’s turn.

“Rotting zombie corpses,” he breathes, thumbing the head of Dean’s cock. It jumps.

“Cheat,” Dean says. “You know how I feel about zombies.”

Sam ignores him. Moves lower, face tender, holds Dean’s balls as if they were something precious – and Dean wants to squirm away or jerk off hard and dry or maybe tear up. Sam says Dean’s name and his voice is too soft, other hand on Dean’s dick, measured and persistent just like Sam when he’s making his point. The way Sam likes it, Dean realizes, and how did they come to have the same taste in dick fondling. Dean lets out a torn sound, shivers of nausea and warmth thundering through his body, too- too- “Sam,” he warns, but his voice doesn’t sound like his own.

Sam looks up, defiant, eyes hot and sweet, like he’s found the final, crucial clue to nail a vengeful ghost, like it’s the one Dean said wont pan out. This has to stop, gotta put an end to it now. Never play this thing again.

Sam meets Dean’s gaze. Stumbles. His hand tenses, then slows, and he lowers his eyes, swallows, hand just resting on Dean’s cock. His eyes are shining with something. Not anything good.

“Sammy,” Dean raises a damp palm to Sam’s face, hesitates, fingertips barely brushing it.

Sam chews his lip for a second, harsh. Pushes something down. Dean’s bad. Dean’s fault.
Gives Dean a soft half smile, a little sad but still glowing, because he’s Sam.

Dean cups Sam’s cheek, wants to touch his bruised lip, wants to touch, ruin everything.

“Dad having sex in your car,” Sam says, hand squeezing Dean’s cock, sparkles reaching his eyes again.

“What the fuck?!” Dean beats Sam’s hands away and they are both laughing.

They are both ok.

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Title: This is not why
Characters: Dean, Sam
Spoilers: 11x02, earlier
Warnings: show level violence, quick and dirty writing

Dean can't take losing Sam again. But that is not why they're staying the hell away from that Regan MacNeil kid.

Sam hadn't felt right for some time, after the cage. Dean had kept explaining it away to himself. No one comes back from hell just right. Probably Sam had been kind enough to look the other way a few times for Dean, when Dean just got back topside. Finding out he'd been lying to himself, about a case, about Sam, that Sam came back wrong, that Sam really was still in hell, Dean's worst nightmare, and Dean was just letting him rot down there, lugging this monster around in his passenger seat across the country - that was a big one for Dean. So yeah, maybe he overstated the 'freak' just a bit .

But that Sam was never evil, not in the hunt-him-down-or-he'll-drink-the-blood-of-your-loved-ones sense. He killed innocents, but wasn't that always the ways, for them.

He chilled Dean to his core, the things he was willing to do, the things Sam was and this thing wasn't. Dean was never meant to be no one's moral compass.

Dean can't say how come Sammy was never a murderous fuck even without his soul. Maybe Sam's used to holding on in order to stay unevil. Maybe it's because Sam is Sam.

But one thing, Dean knows. No way is he allowing Sammy around that Darkness child.

Not because Sam could lose his soul again. Because if Sammy saw what it did to other people, he would never believe he wasn't the same.

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Sweet little fic, later season first time Wincest -
(just in case, I should warn for very mild dubcon, by current standards for that)

It’s over coffee that it happens, Dean leaning around Sam to put the carafe back onto the warmer, and Sam closes the narrow distance between his mouth and Dean’s. Soft, sweet, and all too brief, the kiss breaks as the carafe thunks a little too hard back into it’s place and Dean steps back with wide eyes. He doesn’t run like Sam expects, nor does he lash out like Sam fears he will. Instead, he lifts a trembling hand to his lips, touching them lightly.

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I too enjoyed discovering Dean's puppy look. But one thing I find interesting about it is that probably the reason we're only seeing it now is that Dean didn't use to get things through that with Sam. He used to tell Sam. He used to argue. Sometimes get worried. Sometimes get lied to or kept out. But not this sort of negotiation. It might be a sign Dean perceives them as more equal now .
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Title: To the Pain
Pairing: Undertones of Dean/Sam, Dean/Cas, Sam/Cas
Rating: Gen
Spoilers: vague, for 10x02
Summary: 'Skip to the end'.

So treasure your love... )

ETA: Have I read the perspective thing somewhere? Let me know if I did, please. I'm so paranoid about these things, but it doesn't mean I haven't :)
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Season 5

Swan Song
I probably can't express how much Swan Song touches me.
There is nothing like it.
It made me cry time and again, just looking at the transcript for a second to check for what exactly they said, that sort of thing.

I can't express it.

Bobby and Dean
First time around, I didn't get how far gone Dean had gotten.
Didn't really follow how desperate and hopeless...
A few days ago I rewatched a few of the later episodes. Rewatching still keeps giving me new things, perspectives, concepts.

In one of the earlier episodes of season 5, Bobby is willing to bet his life away to bet to regain some worth . This sort of devaluation of himself - I hadn't realized it - I thought of it as a plot device, and not as something Bobby was going through. And giving up his soul for a while to Crowley... When Dean was going to say yes, Bobby told him that Bobby wanted to shoot himself every single day, and every day didn't, because he'd promised Dean. They influence each other and echpo each other in such a deep way ...

But Dean. Honestly, I so get how come he was going to say yes. It kinda amazes me that he didn't, earlier - just out of stubbornness, insisting on resisting coercion, being contrary cause he's Dean - I don't know how he made it that far, I don't.

Dean and Sam
And Sam... Hearing from Dean that Dean didn't believe in him, and believing in Dean anyway, and saving the world cause he did, and saving Dean and OMG I'm crying just writing this, I'm so gone for this show. One of Sam's many shining moments that don't get enough attention. And Dean actually acknowledging it... OMG. Boys. After all the bad stuff that's happened between them in seasons 4-5, all the trust issues, being able to trust each other and lean on each other ...


Oh - The Amulet

I still hope they do put it into some episode, ever.
Maybe in a shark -jumping sort of way.
My boy Robbie wants it back....
I'll probably be wary about it, and not consider it exactly canon, if they do - unless it's unexpectedly amazing - but I'd still like them to do it.
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[I guess, warnings for mentions of sex, and much silliness]

There's this pic of Sam and Dean, then and now.
Now I looked at it again, and it's - that's definitely not the story here.
This is Dean chatting with Sam, then "Dude! How fast *does* your hair grow?"
And it has, it's grown in the past few seconds - Dean remembers that when he was describing that waitress' tits Sam pushed it behind his ear, pretending he wasn't interested in the story, and the strands rested on the shell of his ear, Dean wondered whether they tickled. And now that they were down to the morning blowjob she gave Dean, Sam's hair was almost down to his shoulders!
"I swear I'm gonna cut that thing off in your sleep one night, Sammy".

Question is, is Sam's hair really growing that fast? And like twice a day Dean gets to/has to cut it off at gas stop bathrooms or in the woods, leaving generic material all over the place, just to enable them to hunt?
Or does Dean just talk about sex very elaborately?
I say it's probably some witch who heard Dean bitching about the length of Sammy'
s hair :-)


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